Pay For Play

 

Give me your authoritarians yearning to be free
(for a hefty fee)

Come all ye drug lords seeking immunity
(for a tribute fee)

Get your Trump Gold Card

and Pass Go immediately
(for a Bigger Better Shakedown fee)

Welcome to the United States of Bribery

where we cater exclusively

to those elites with the means

with no embarrassing questions asked

about your former illegalities

here in the New Improved

Land of the Free

if the price is right